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If my best wines mislike thy taste, / And my best service win thy frown, / Then tarry not, I bid thee haste; / There's many another Inn in town. (Thomas Bailey Aldrich)
I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me than a full frontal lobotomy. (Fred Allen)
I'm not a drinker - my body will not tolerate spirits. I had two Martinis on New Year's Eve and I tried to hijack an elevator and fly it to Cuba. (Woody Allen)
One of the the easiest questions is: What do you want to drink? Tennessee sipping whiskey, if you please. Drink is beauty in simplicity thanks to the masters of that craft. (David Allio)
Quickly, bring me a beaker of wine, so that I may whet my mind and say something clever. (Aristophanes)
Young people are in a condition like permanent intoxication, because youth is sweet and they are growing. (Aristotle)
It is not opium which makes me work but its absence, and in order for me to feel its absence it must from time to time be present. (Antonin Artaud)
Fun drunks make a nice addition to any party. Not looking to fight. Not looking to score. Just looking to get drunk and laugh. (Jay Asher)
One reason why I don't drink is because I wish to know when I am having a good time. (Nancy Astor)
You can't drown yourself in drink. I've tried, you float. (John Barrymore)
It is the hour to be drunken! to escape being the martyred slaves of time, be ceaselessly drunk. On wine, on poetry, or on virtue, as you wish. (Charles Baudelaire)
The whisky bears a grudge against the decanter. (Samuel Beckett)
Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with that it's compounding a felony. (Robert Benchley)
There are plenty of alcoholics who can be magnificent when drunk: it does not make them any less alcoholic. (Ingrid Bengis)
The man who gets drunk in peacetime is a coward. The man who gets drunk in wartime goes on being a coward. (Jose Bergamin)
Something has been said for sobriety but very little. (John Berryman)
All pictures that's painted with sense and with thought / Are painted by madmen as sure as a groat; / For the greater the fool in the pencil more blest, / And when they are drunk they always paint best. (William Blake)
I never knew my father was an alcoholic until he came home sober one night. (Andre Botes)
Wine is a treacherous friend who you must always be on guard for. (Christian Nestell Bovee)
You must stay drunk on [your art] so reality cannot destroy you. (Ray Bradbury)
When you stop drinking, you have to deal with this marvelous personality that started you drinking in the first place. (Jimmy Breslin)
- Women...
That's the problem with drinking, I thought, as I poured myself a drink. If something bad happens you drink in an attempt to forget; if something good happens you drink in order to celebrate; and if nothing happens you drink to make something happen. (Charles Bukowski)
- b.1729 d.1797...
Under the pressure of the cares and sorrows of our mortal condition, men have at all times, and in all countries, called in some physical aid to their moral consolations - wine, beer, opium, brandy, or tobacco. (Edmund Burke)
It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth. (George Burns)
When I played drunks I had to remain sober because I didn't know how to play them when I was drunk. (Richard Burton)
If the headache would only precede the intoxication, alcoholism would be a virtue. (Samuel Butler, novelist)
-misattributed...
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. (George Carlin)
I'm very serious about no alcohol, no drugs. Life is too beautiful. (Jim Carrey)
I hope I'll never be is drunk with my own power. (Jim Carrey)
I know folks all have a tizzy about it, but I like a little bourbon of an evening. It helps me sleep. I don't much care what they say about it. (Lillian Carter)
- Journey to the End of the Night...
Love is like liquor. The drunker and more impotent you are, the stronger and smarter you think yourself and the surer you are of your rights. (Louis-Ferdinand Celine)
Drink moderately, for drunkenness neither keeps a secret, nor observes a promise. (Miguel de Cervantes)
- The Long Goodbye, 1953...
Alcohol is like love: the first kiss is magic, the second is intimate, the third is routine. After that you just take the girl's clothes off. (Raymond Chandler)
A man's true character comes out when he's drunk. (Charlie Chaplin)
When all is said and done, no literature can outdo the cynicism of real life; you won't intoxicate with one glass someone who has already drunk up a whole barrel. (Anton Chekhov)
Before the Roman came to Rye or out to severn strode, / The rolling English drunkard made the rolling English road. (G. K. Chesterton)
No animal ever invented anything so bad as drunkenness – or so good as drink. (G. K. Chesterton)
Life itself is the proper binge. (Julia Child)
To Ibn Saud when he heard that the king's religion forbade smoking and alcohol: 'I must point out that my rule of life prescribed as an absolutely sacred rite smoking cigars and also the drinking of alcohol before, after, and if need be during all meals and in the intervals between them.' (Winston Churchill)
I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. (Winston Churchill)
There's nothing wrong with sobriety in moderation. (John Ciardi)
In my head I am in one of those Buddhist caves where you see a thousand Buddha faces on the wall. In my head I am on my seventeen-year-old acid trip, when I saw my personas fall one minute after another, as if I was dying every moment. (Francesco Clemente)
Like a bird on the wire, / Like a drunk in a midnight choir / I have tried in my way to be free. (Leonard Cohen)
I fought against the bottle, but I had to do it drunk. Took my diamond to the pawn shop, but that don't make it junk. (Leonard Cohen)
Alcohol whipped me. Alcohol and I had many, many marvelous times together. We laughed, we talked, we danced at the party together; then one day I woke up and the band had gone home and I was lying in the broken glass with a shirt full of puke and I said, 'Hey, man, the ball game's up.' (Harry Crews)
While I was an addict, I didn't write anything. I didn't have the attention span or the will. (David Crosby)
I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it. (Rodney Dangerfield)
An American monkey after getting drunk on brandy would never touch it again, and thus is much wiser than most men. (Charles Darwin)
Alcohol gives you infinite patience for stupidity. (Sammy Davis, Jr.)
The vine bears three kinds of grapes: the first of pleasure, the second of intoxication, the third of disgust. (Diogenes)
The intoxication of anger, like that of the grape, shows us to others, but hides us from ourselves. (John Dryden)
- The Count of Monte Cristo...
So much the worse for those who fear wine, for it is because they have some bad thoughts which they are afraid the liquor will extract from their hearts. (Alexandre Dumas)
Drunk emotions aren't real emotions. (Lena Dunham)
Wine is as good as life to a man, if it be drunk moderately: what is life then to a man that is without wine? For it was made to make men glad. (Ecclesiasticus)
It will do you no harm to find yourself ridiculous. / Resign yourself to be the fool you are. / You will find that you survive humiliation / And that's an experience of incalculable value. (T. S. Eliot)
A bottle of wine begs to be shared; I have never met a miserly wine lover. (Clifton Fadiman)
Happiness can be bought with a bottle of wine and has become ambiguous through overuse. (Timothy Ferriss)
If our small minds, for some convenience, divide this glass of wine, this universe, into parts - physics, biology, geology, astronomy, psychology, and so on - remember that nature does not know it. So let us put it all back together, not forgetting ultimately what it is for. Let it give us one more final pleasure; drink it and forget it all! (Richard Feynman)
A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her. (W. C. Fields)
Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake. (W. C. Fields)
Drown in a cold vat of whiskey? Death, where is thy sting? (W. C. Fields)
Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times. (W. C. Fields)
Drink! for you know not when you came, nor why: / Drink! for you know not why you go, nor where. (Edward Fitzgerald)
- WWD, regarding the demise of John Galliano...
Was Galliano drunk and egged on? Apparently. But we can each write one part of every script - our own. (Bridget Foley)
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. (Benjamin Franklin)
In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria. (Benjamin Franklin)
So many vibrant colors, so many new ideas, so many paintings in my head - intoxicating thoughts and visions... (Eric Frantz)
Bibens post opus - Do your drinking after your work. (Kjerkius Gennius, 36BC)
Drunkenness is never anything but a substitute for happiness. (Andre Gide)
If the storm within gets too loud, I take a glass too much to stun myself. (Vincent van Gogh)
Good liquor, I stoutly maintain, / Gives genius a better discerning. (Oliver Goldsmith)
The only way that I could figure they could improve upon Coca-Cola, one of life's most delightful elixirs, which studies prove will heal the sick and occasionally raise the dead, is to put rum or bourbon in it. (Lewis Grizzard)
An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools. (Ernest Hemingway)
The artist should be intoxicated with the idea of the thing he wants to express. (Robert Henri)
Drink not the third glass, which thou canst not tame, when once it is within thee. (George Herbert)
Who could have foretold, from the structure of the brain, that wine could derange its functions? (Hippocrates)
Sometimes when you're drunk you can see better. (Damien Hirst)
I thought for a change I would give up drinking, and it was a great mistake, and, although I reduced the size of my nose and improved my beauty, my stomach suffered. (Winslow Homer)
They who drink beer will think beer. (Washington Irving)
The sway of alcohol over mankind is unquestionably due to its power to stimulate the mystical faculties of human nature. (William James)
If 'feeling good' could decide, drunkenness would be the supremely valid human experience. (William James)
I keep telling people: Don't make me the poster boy for AA because I don't know a lot about sobriety, but I do know a lot about drinking. (Billy Joel)
A tavern chair is the throne of human felicity. (Samuel Johnson)
A man who exposes himself when he is intoxicated, has not the art of getting drunk. (Samuel Johnson)
Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether the narcotic be alcohol or morphine or idealism. (Carl Gustav Jung)
My peers, lately, have found companionship through means of intoxication - it makes them sociable. I, however, cannot force myself to use drugs to cheat on my loneliness - it is all that I have - and when the drugs and alcohol dissipate, will be all that my peers have as well. (Franz Kafka)
O for a draught of vintage! that hath been / Cool'd a long age in the deep-delved earth. (John Keats)
- Satori in Paris & Pic...
My manners, abominable at times, can be sweet. As I grew older I became a drunk. Why? Because I like ecstasy of the mind. I'm a wretch. But I love, love. (Jack Kerouac)
Even though a number of people have tried, no one has yet found a way to drink for a living. (Jean Kerr)
I work until beer o'clock. (Stephen King)
People who drink to drown their sorrow should be told that sorrow knows how to swim. (Ann Landers)
The attempt to make the consumption of beer criminal is as silly and as futile as if you passed a law to send a man to jail for eating cucumber salad. (Stephen Leacock)
There are three side effects of acid: enhanced long-term memory, decreased short-term memory, and I forget the third. (Timothy Leary)
I don't drink. I don't like it. It makes me feel good. (Oscar Levant)
A man takes a drink, the drink takes another, and the drink takes the man. (Sinclair Lewis)
There is nothing contemptible about an intoxicated man - if it is nothing more than a bookful of words or a roomful of notes that he has got drunk on. (Wyndham Lewis)
How little our libraries cost us as compared with our liquor cellars. (John Lubbock)
Prohibition makes you want to cry in your beer and denies you the beer to cry into. (Don Marquis)
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on. (Dean Martin)
Prohibition may be a disputed theory, but none can say that it doesn't hold water. (Thomas L. Masson)
I know people who do a lot of drugs, and they keep thinking about things from the past and things ahead. But they're not living right here and now. (Danny Masterson)
If I'm not the one thing you can't stand to lose, / If I'm not that arrow to the heart of you, / If you don't get drunk on my kiss, / If you think you can do better than this then I guess we're done. / Let's not drag this on, / Consider me gone... (Reba McEntire)
Write first, drink later. (Patrick McGrath)
I know some people who are constantly drunk on books as other men are drunk on whiskey or religion. (H. L. Mencken)
And if I drink oblivion of a day, / So shorten I the stature of my soul. (George Meredith)
Creation is a drug I can't do without. (Cecil B. de Mille)
-notice to visitors...
Those interested in celestial navigation are advised to first obtain a rudimentary knowledge of integral calculus, phlebotomy, astral physics and related subjects. The use of liquor is strictly forbidden on interplanetary flights. (Henry Miller)
Satiety comes of too frequent repetition; and he who will not give himself leisure to be thirsty can never find the true pleasure of drinking. (Michel de Montaigne)
I am simply a 'book drunkard.' Books have the same irresistible temptation for me that liquor has for its devotee. I cannot withstand them. (Lucy Maud Montgomery)
Drinking is an art, not a sport. You make it a sport, you're dead in the water, you lose everything. It'll kill you, I tell you. (Michael Moriarty)
Being drunk is a good disguise. I drink so I can talk to assholes. This includes me. (Jim Morrison)
No person hath drunk a better draught than that of anger which he hath swallowed for God's sake. (Muhammad)
Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker. (Ogden Nash)
- 100 Love Sonnets ...
And I, infinitesimal being, / drunk with the great starry / void, / likeness, image of
mystery, / I felt myself a pure part / of the abyss, / I wheeled with the stars, / my heart broke loose on the wind. (Pablo Neruda)
I like on the table, / when we're speaking, / the light of a bottle / of intelligent wine. (Pablo Neruda)
Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. (Jack Nicholson)
For art to exist, for any sort of aesthetic activity or perception to exist, a certain physiological precondition is indispensable: intoxication. (Friedrich Nietzsche)
- Thinks and Remarks by Bill Nye, Drunk in a Plug Hat, 1886...
The earth is convulsed with a universal sob, and the roads are muddy with tears. But I do not call to mind a more touching picture of unavailing misery and ruin, and hopeless chaos, than the plug hat that has endeavored to keep sober and maintain self-respect while its owner was drunk. (Edgar Wilson Nye)
- Long Day's Journey into Night...
Be always drunken. Nothing else matters: that is the only question. If you would not feel the horrible burden of Time weighing on your shoulders and crushing you to the earth, be drunken continually. (Eugene O'Neill)
Drunken with what? With wine, with poetry, or with virtue, as you will. But be drunken. (Eugene O'Neill)
My favorite food from my homeland is Guinness. My second choice is Guinness. My third choice - would have to be Guinness. (Peter O'Toole)
Many people - and I think I am one of them - are more productive when they've had a little to drink. I find if I drink two or three brandies, I'm far better able to write. (David Ogilvy)
It is widely held that too much wine will dull a man's desire. Indeed it will in a dull man. (John James Osborne)
It is not true that drink changes a man's character. It may reveal it more clearly. (John James Osborne)
There is more refreshment and stimulation in a nap, even of the briefest, than in all the alcohol ever distilled. (Ovid)
Drunkenness... spoils health, dismounts the mind, and unmans the man. (William Penn)
Your poems are of interest to mankind; your liver isn't. Drink till you write well and feel sick. Bless your poems and be damned to you. (Fernando Pessoa)
If I had all the money I've spent on drink, I'd spend it on drink. (Chris Pig)
He was a wise man who invented beer. (Plato)
This is the great fault of wine; it first trips up the feet: it is a cunning wrestler. (Plautus)
Let us celebrate the occasion with wine and sweet words. (Plautus)
Please don't drive drunk, okay? Seriously... But by all means, walk drunk. That looks hilarious. Everyone loves to watch someone act like they are trying to make it to safety during a hurricane. (Amy Poehler)
It's all right to drink like a fish - if you drink what a fish drinks. (Mary Pettibone Poole)
A little learning is a dangerous thing; / Drink deep, or taste not the Pierian spring: / There shallow draughts intoxicate the brain, / And drinking largely sobers us again. (Alexander Pope)
I'll never feel comfortable taking a strong drink, and I'll never feel easy smoking a cigarette. I just don't think those things are right for me. (Elvis Presley)
- The War of Art...
Have you ever wondered why the slang terms for intoxication are so demolition-oriented? Stoned, smashed, hammered. It's because they're talking about the Ego. It's the Ego that gets blasted, waxed, plastered. (Steven Pressfield)
First the man takes a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes the man. (proverb)
Strength of mind rests in sobriety; for this keeps your reason unclouded by passion. (Pythagoras)
Nobody will laugh long who deals much with opium: its pleasures even are of a grave and solemn complexion. (Thomas de Quincey)
I drink no more than a sponge. (Francois Rabelais)
The scent of wine, oh how much more agreeable, laughing, praying, celestial and delicious it is than that of oil! (Francois Rabelais)
The few bad poems which occasionally are created during abstinence are of no great interest. (Wilhelm Reich)
I envy the poet. He is encouraged toward drunkenness and wallows with nubile wenches while the painter must endure wretchedness and pain for his art. (Rembrandt)
-The New York Times, April 9, 1883...
If any young man wants to be a true temperance man let him go and get the delirium tremens, that'll settle it. (Dan Rice)
The whiskey on your breath / Could make a small boy dizzy; / But I hung on like death: / Such waltzing was not easy. (Theodore Roethke)
Now I am sober and there's only the hangover and the memory of love. (Rumi)
No, thank you, I was born intoxicated. (George William Russell)
When I am in the cellar of affliction, I look for the Lord's choicest wines. (Samuel Rutherford)
- Bonjour tristesse...
It amused me to think that one can tell the truth when one is drunk and nobody will believe it. (Francoise Sagan)
I doubt if you can have a truly wild party without liquor. (Carl Sandburg)
One drop of hatred left in the cup of joy turns the most blissful draught into poison. (Johann Friedrich von Schiller)
Milk is for babies. When you grow up you have to drink beer. (Arnold Schwarzenegger)
Of all vices, drinking is the most incompatible with greatness. (Sir Walter Scott)
Drunkenness is simply voluntary insanity. (Seneca)
Let's go and get drunk on light again – it has the power to console. (Georges Seurat)
It provokes the desire, but it takes away the performance. Therefore much drink may be said to be an equivocator with lechery. (William Shakespeare)
I am only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. (George Bernard Shaw)
I have drunken deep of joy, / And I will taste no other wine tonight. (Percy Bysshe Shelley)
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy. (Frank Sinatra)
Good days are to be gathered like grapes, to be trodden and bottled into wine and kept for age to sip at ease beside the fire. If the traveler has vintaged well, he need trouble to wander no longer; the ruby moments glow in his glass at will. (Freya Stark)
In the souls of the people the grapes of wrath are filling and growing heavy, growing heavy for the vintage. (John Steinbeck)
Edward was at the stage of drunkenness in which the ego glows like a coal, and brilliant people become more inspired, but in which dull people, fired by the same inspiration, become only more dull. (William Styron)
Quart of whiskey a day for months working hard on a long poem. Wife hiding bottles, myself hiding bottles. Murderous and suicidal. Many hospitalizations, many alibis. (James Taylor)
The first glass is for myself, the second for my friends, the third for good humor, and the forth for my enemies. (Sir William Temple)
An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do. (Dylan Thomas)
Of all ebriosity, who does not prefer to be intoxicated by the air he breathes? (Henry David Thoreau)
One martini is all right, two is too many, three is not enough. (James Thurber)
Of course one should not drink much, but often. (Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec)
Unrecognized alcoholism is the ruling pathology among writers and intellectuals. (Diana Trilling)
Total abstinence is so excellent a thing that it cannot be carried to too great an extent. In my passion for it I even carry it so far as to totally abstain from total abstinence itself. (Mark Twain)
Some writers take to drink, others take to audiences. (Gore Vidal)
Use, do not abuse; neither abstinence nor excess ever renders man happy. (Voltaire)
-collector of traditional masterpieces...
I'm an incurable artoholic. (Jack Warner)
I never trust a man that doesn't drink. (John Wayne)
Imaginary good is boring. Real good is always new, marvelous, and intoxicating. (Simone Weil)
- The Second Tree from the Corner...
Have you ever found anything that gives you relief?... 'Yes. A drink.' (E. B. White)
Being a functioning alcoholic is kind of like being a paraplegic lap dancer - you can do it, just not as well as the others, really. (Robin Williams)
Cat on a Hot Tin Roof...
'Mendacity is a system that we live in,' declares Brick. 'Liquor is one way out an' death's the other.' (Tennessee Williams)
The human mind is capable of excitement without the application of gross and violent stimulants; and he must have a very faint perception of its beauty and dignity who does not know this. (William Wordsworth)
The worst thing about some men is that when they are not drunk they are sober. (William Butler Yeats)
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. (Henny Youngman)
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